These are a few of the quotes from people who have encountered Mr. Farley and his work:
“Wow, that’s really something.”
- B.Z. from Pueblo
“Yeah, that’s like a super something.”
- J.L. from Chattenooga
“So, how long does it take you to do this?”
- V.N. from Montclair
"You are the bestest artist in the whole #%@&*# neighborhood! I just love your #%#&*# work! Do you charge by the foot, the yard, or what? Can you paint me something to match my wallpaper and sofa? They’re both done in a sort of a 1970‘s polyester disco era looking cross between a quasi floral and semi random hound’s tooth like pattern in hot pink, dark chocolate brown, metallic silver and light pastel lime green. Anyways, l want a BIG painting, in THOSE colors, on velvet, with knitting kitties, line dancing cowboy and cowgirl unicorns, bicycle riding sad chihuahuas with funny hats and a bunch of leprechauns. But not the scary kind. Don’t you DARE paint me no SCARY leprechauns. lt’s a little after noon, now, so, lf you can immediately drop what you’re doing, get started on my painting and finish it by five o’ clock today, in time for the weekend, that would be great.”
- K.L. from Columbus
“Let me get this straight. You spend week after week, month after month, trying to make one oil painting look like it was done on a computer? Oh yeah, that makes perfect sense.”
- U.E. from Madison
"You've obviously taken the par broiled zeitgeist of the subconscious collective and infused it with anthropomorphic undercurrents of the modern bifurcated duality we've inherited from our undead authoritarian parental overseers of future days not yet passed and re-packaged it as an echo of revisionist adaptive differential modality in a nouveau dada-ist, quasi-post extemporaneously augmented, hyper reticulated, metaphorically coagulated tableau. But I LIKE it."
- T.L. from Manhattan
"So, how long does it take you to do this?"
- R.B. from Ottawa
"So, how long does it take you to do this?"
- S.H. from Redding
"So, how long does it take you to do this?"
- L.M. from Keokuk
“So, how long does it take you to do this?”
-C.D. from Pacoima
"I told my Mom how long it takes you to finish a painting and she said you must be doing something wrong."
- P.B. from Sherman Oaks
"Forget about galleries, art shows, generating publicity, making a name for yourself in the art world, and all that jazz. What a hassle. lt’s simple. You need to take your one-of-a-kind paintings to the SWAP MEET. You’ll be rich and famous in no time. Swap meet has the world’s greatest art anywhere! Clown paintings, bull fight posters, portraits of Elvis, you name it. One time, back in the 80’s, I got me an “original” Nagel there. I know it's an “original” because it says Nagel all over it, and only “originals” tell you the name of the artist. You betcha’. And l bought me another “original" of that guy’s stuff who does the dogs playing poker, and he’s like the most famous artist in the world, right? Gotta be worth a ton of money now. l sho’ ‘nuff do loves me some SWAP MEET art. Now, that’s art l can understand.”
- D.S. from Spring Valley
"So, how long does it take you to do this?"
- G.Y. from Regina
“Could I get in your comment page if I say something really smart and, you know, like, super clever like? Am l going to be famous if you use my name? How much could I expect to be paid for something like that?”
- C.B. from Little Rock
“You’re one of the artists doing the art show, right? So, after all the time it took to create your body of work, you spent day after day putting your inventory together in a presentable manner, drove numerous hours to get here, paid for a motel room, then, first thing in the morning, went through the hectic mad dash of setting up your display in the short amount of time these events give you, dealt with all manner of unforseen details which did not go according to plan, but were essential, nonetheless, and, even though you are exhausted and want nothing more, at this point, than to return to wonderful, carefree sleep, you are here, basically, to entertain me, the would be customer, by answering the most inane questions imaginable, hopefully, so that l can have something to add at parties when the conversation turns to art, which I, pretty much, don’t care for, or understand, but will pretend to, for as long as l can, until it begins to dawn on you that l am not going to buy anything. You get paid for that, don’t you? Someone pays you to do that, right?”
- A.W. from Tulsa
"Wow! Unbelievable! You are the next Picasso. But you're way beyond Picasso. I am going to make you the biggest thing in the art world since Van Gogh's ear. I'm going to make you the most famous artist ever. EVER!!! I'm going to get your stuff on lunch boxes, basketball shoes, ATM cards, disposable lighters, you name it. I'm going to get you in the BIGGEST galleries and museums in the world. I'm going to make you a superstar, baby! You won't have to do ANYTHING but paint. I'll do EVERYTHING. I will take care of every little thing you need. I will blow your mind with how successful I am going to make you. Hey, are you going to finish that sandwich? You don't mind, do you? You don’t have a couple bucks l could borrow to get something to wash this down with, do you?"
-A.K.. from Atlanta
“So, how long does it take you to do this?”
- R.G. from Winnemucca
“Wow, that’s really something.”
- B.Z. from Pueblo
“Yeah, that’s like a super something.”
- J.L. from Chattenooga
“So, how long does it take you to do this?”
- V.N. from Montclair
"You are the bestest artist in the whole #%@&*# neighborhood! I just love your #%#&*# work! Do you charge by the foot, the yard, or what? Can you paint me something to match my wallpaper and sofa? They’re both done in a sort of a 1970‘s polyester disco era looking cross between a quasi floral and semi random hound’s tooth like pattern in hot pink, dark chocolate brown, metallic silver and light pastel lime green. Anyways, l want a BIG painting, in THOSE colors, on velvet, with knitting kitties, line dancing cowboy and cowgirl unicorns, bicycle riding sad chihuahuas with funny hats and a bunch of leprechauns. But not the scary kind. Don’t you DARE paint me no SCARY leprechauns. lt’s a little after noon, now, so, lf you can immediately drop what you’re doing, get started on my painting and finish it by five o’ clock today, in time for the weekend, that would be great.”
- K.L. from Columbus
“Let me get this straight. You spend week after week, month after month, trying to make one oil painting look like it was done on a computer? Oh yeah, that makes perfect sense.”
- U.E. from Madison
"You've obviously taken the par broiled zeitgeist of the subconscious collective and infused it with anthropomorphic undercurrents of the modern bifurcated duality we've inherited from our undead authoritarian parental overseers of future days not yet passed and re-packaged it as an echo of revisionist adaptive differential modality in a nouveau dada-ist, quasi-post extemporaneously augmented, hyper reticulated, metaphorically coagulated tableau. But I LIKE it."
- T.L. from Manhattan
"So, how long does it take you to do this?"
- R.B. from Ottawa
"So, how long does it take you to do this?"
- S.H. from Redding
"So, how long does it take you to do this?"
- L.M. from Keokuk
“So, how long does it take you to do this?”
-C.D. from Pacoima
"I told my Mom how long it takes you to finish a painting and she said you must be doing something wrong."
- P.B. from Sherman Oaks
"Forget about galleries, art shows, generating publicity, making a name for yourself in the art world, and all that jazz. What a hassle. lt’s simple. You need to take your one-of-a-kind paintings to the SWAP MEET. You’ll be rich and famous in no time. Swap meet has the world’s greatest art anywhere! Clown paintings, bull fight posters, portraits of Elvis, you name it. One time, back in the 80’s, I got me an “original” Nagel there. I know it's an “original” because it says Nagel all over it, and only “originals” tell you the name of the artist. You betcha’. And l bought me another “original" of that guy’s stuff who does the dogs playing poker, and he’s like the most famous artist in the world, right? Gotta be worth a ton of money now. l sho’ ‘nuff do loves me some SWAP MEET art. Now, that’s art l can understand.”
- D.S. from Spring Valley
"So, how long does it take you to do this?"
- G.Y. from Regina
“Could I get in your comment page if I say something really smart and, you know, like, super clever like? Am l going to be famous if you use my name? How much could I expect to be paid for something like that?”
- C.B. from Little Rock
“You’re one of the artists doing the art show, right? So, after all the time it took to create your body of work, you spent day after day putting your inventory together in a presentable manner, drove numerous hours to get here, paid for a motel room, then, first thing in the morning, went through the hectic mad dash of setting up your display in the short amount of time these events give you, dealt with all manner of unforseen details which did not go according to plan, but were essential, nonetheless, and, even though you are exhausted and want nothing more, at this point, than to return to wonderful, carefree sleep, you are here, basically, to entertain me, the would be customer, by answering the most inane questions imaginable, hopefully, so that l can have something to add at parties when the conversation turns to art, which I, pretty much, don’t care for, or understand, but will pretend to, for as long as l can, until it begins to dawn on you that l am not going to buy anything. You get paid for that, don’t you? Someone pays you to do that, right?”
- A.W. from Tulsa
"Wow! Unbelievable! You are the next Picasso. But you're way beyond Picasso. I am going to make you the biggest thing in the art world since Van Gogh's ear. I'm going to make you the most famous artist ever. EVER!!! I'm going to get your stuff on lunch boxes, basketball shoes, ATM cards, disposable lighters, you name it. I'm going to get you in the BIGGEST galleries and museums in the world. I'm going to make you a superstar, baby! You won't have to do ANYTHING but paint. I'll do EVERYTHING. I will take care of every little thing you need. I will blow your mind with how successful I am going to make you. Hey, are you going to finish that sandwich? You don't mind, do you? You don’t have a couple bucks l could borrow to get something to wash this down with, do you?"
-A.K.. from Atlanta
“So, how long does it take you to do this?”
- R.G. from Winnemucca
"Word up, dog. Hey there, Mister Bad Mammo Jammo, let me tell you, fer reals, your schizzo be off the izzo, G. Your art stuff is dope, esse, know what I mean? Yo, check it, I'm in a gang and me and my homies would just go ape to the zape if you could tattoo us with our colors, dig? It's cool if you don't already have a needle, 'cause I got a killer one I made from an electric tooth brush and an old guitar string. Yeah, l learned how to make one in the slammer. How’d you know?"
- G.Z. from Long Beach
"I don't need to know nothing about no art. What good is it? Can it get me laid? Oh, really? it CAN? Well, hey, in that case, sure, I'll buy some of your art stuff. You want to work a trade for some Smokey And The Bandit collectible memorabilia?"
- B.Z. from Pine Bluff
"So, how long does it take you to do this?"
- T.W. from Sioux Falls
"Political cartoons. THAT'S what you should be doing. With your talent, it'll be a piece of cake. So what, if you can see BOTH sides of an issue? So what, if you DON’T have an opinion, one way or another? So what, if you DON’T feel you have anything MEANINGFUL to add to the discussion? You think that's stopping those other morons?"
- J.L. from Pflugerville
"Well, I suppose your work is decent enough, considering you are a California artist. Of course, once you get to New York, then your art will really be saying something. That’s common knowledge."
- P.C. from Soho
"The best thing about you is you are a California artist. After all, the only art really saying anything, these days, is being done out west. That’s common knowledge."
- E.A. from Century City
"I'm not sure I care for what you're advocating, mister. And as soon as I can figure out exactly WHAT that IS, me and my concerned citizens action committee are coming after you."
- I.W. from Birmingham
"You are really good. You ever do any of them caricature things, like them guys at the fair? Last year, I was getting me a corn dog, looking at these guys, when I thought about you. You need to get in on this racket. There would have to be something seriously wrong with a person if they DID NOT want someone like you, drawing a picture of them with a super giant head and a teeny tiny body, doing some goofy, silly stuff. You know, like making ‘em look drunk and crazy. Maybe they’re driving a tiny little car, all DUI like. People love that. Throw in a witty saying, you know, something off a bumper sticker, or from a light beer commercial, and you’re home free. Sit back and watch the money pour in.”
- S.G. from Shreveport
“Gosh, um, yeah, wow, hey, uh, yessiree, that, there, is, uh, well, it’s, uh, it’s really, uh.........something. Yep. Tell you what.”
- H.H. from Arlen
“You should just have ME on this page, talking about you and your art thing. Get rid of them other bozos. Have you actually READ the things they’re saying? I don’t get it. It’s useless. All of it. Garbage. Now, if it’s ME doing the talking, it would absolutely blow people’s minds. I’ll say whatever you want me to say, only it will come out sounding so much more WAY COOL and awesome, because l CAN’T HELP but say way cool and awesome things ALL the time. Seriously. ALL the time. Ask anyone who knows me. You should stop whatever you are doing and just follow me around, for a couple of days, and write down things that come out of my mouth. Man, l can make you sound like the next Jesus, only WAY cooler and way, WAY more awesome! Compared to you, Jesus is gonna look like a chump. It’ll be like, “Yo’, Jesus, get a job, you loser”.”
- B.M. from Beaumont
“Some of them artists are painting Bluebonnets now. You know, the flowers? Whole fields of bluebonnets. Yep. l seen ‘em. They’re doing that now. Just thought you’d like to know, you being an artist, and all.”
- T.L. from Plano
"This is INSANE! Why would anyone go to the extremes you do? How everything has to “fit together” and what not. lt drives me nuts, looking at how devoted you are to not resting until everything is so precise and exacting. And all that microscopic detail you do. And for WHO? You think ANYONE actually cares about “real” art anymore? You know, art that takes chances, and does whatever it needs to, to stand apart from the herd, for right now and for future generations. You could get by with a LOT less, trust me on this one. Look at what the famous and wealthy artists are doing. You think they care about ANY of that “truth” stuff? You kidding me? They gave up caring years ago. Why can't you just do what THEY do, instead of obsessing on this absurd “quest thing” kick you’re always on?"
- V.P. from Buffalo
"Are these real people and did they actually say all this?"
- D.T.Z.B. lll esq. from Walla Walla
"So, how long does it take you to do this? And, by the way, how DID you write Plastic Man? Did that take very long? You sure that wasn't you? Naw, I don't think so. lt was you. You can’t fool me. I saw your picture on the telly. I'm sure it's you. Come on, mate, just between you and me. How DID you write Plastic Man?"
- M.S. from Manchester
"Yes, but what does it all MEAN??? What EXACTLY are you trying to SAY? You must explain EVERY little detail to me and it's DEEP, hidden SIGNIFICANCE. Not that I'll understand ANY of it., or BUY any of your work, not even a cheap post card, to compensate you for your time and trouble, after you finish your LENGTHY dissertation, while actual potential customers pass you by, without stopping to purchase any of your work, because you were TOO BUSY yapping to lil’ ole’, ME, ME, ME. And, yes, I basically feel people are put on this earth to answer every tedious question I put to words, no matter HOW MANY TIMES I have to pester them."
- Enthralled admirer at recent art show.
"So, how long does it take you to do this?"
- R.C. from The Bronx
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